Whirlwind

We may not know when the right partner to come, yet rest assured, he/she will come.

Marrying someone in a whirlwind love does not assure it will last forever. More often, resulting to a much deeper grieving – why is that?

I have invested in the past much in feelings. Ignored facts thrown in my face. Accepted decisions will bear good fruit. In the end, I lost.

After a long while of grieving, the realisation is somehow set me free. We are not meant to be. We are of the past, and will remain in the past.

If someone will come, I hope I would be smart enough not to fall so intensely. Whirlwind is definitely a bad idea, yet hopefully not exactly a bad thing after all.

There are indefinite reasons why we fell in love.
And there are indefinite reasons why we fell out of love as well.

Ridiculous.

The Cry

Deep within my heart, I am crying.

A painting could display happiness, joy, extravagance – it exhibits all the meaning you can find in the world, yet would never be a guarantee that the painter was happy and gleeful when painted that piece of art.

No one knows.

People are unique but feelings are same in every single way. People get hurt. Feel sad. Feel bad. Feel unwelcome. Feel unworthy. Feel empty. People even feel the other way around.

In the world, there is nothing that makes me completely happy. I get what I want now, yet still I don’t feel the true meaning of being happy. Still, I feel empty.

Only when I talked to Him, I feel happy because I feel I am so loved. I have peace in mind because I let go of what my whole being wanted to scream. I rested because I know He will take care of me.

I don’t know what His plans for me, but I will wait and trust His heart, because I know, His plans for me are plans to prosper me and not to harm me.

I thank Him for all the love.

Undescribable Love

Not a word I can describe love. Love is too harsh.

I loved, and loved, and loved, tries not to love yet I love again.

Crazy as it is but am pondering myself telling it’s ok, but it is never ok. I am not ok!

I am an ass for seeking much attention. I am stupid for dreaming the kind of love that I could not even describe.

I’m doomed. And this is so ridiculous!